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21 June 2007 

I'm in it for the kids.

My principal called me last night and talked to me for over half an hour. "I'm in it for the kids," she continually blurted. Yeah, awesome, me too, stop. It's almost felt like a cover, all too convenient. But I guess I think being in it for the kids is shown through actions and not having to blatantly state it to a teacher who often puts in 90 hour weeks.

I left a pleading letter with her on my last day of work, and it basically took her through why I'm justified moving on. I tried to employ logic, and I even let a little emotion creep in to see if that would work too. I just wanted her to see that my decision making was very deliberate and not something she should take personal. I think my letter hit some sort of emotional chord with her. She cares very much about her image as a principal, and she interpreted my letter as me having a negative one of her. It wasn't really about her at all, but that's what happens when narcissistic people deal with other narcissistic people.

After a lot of her being passive-aggressive and scolding me for things that couldn't be prevented (how am I supposed to tell her I want to leave before I knew I wanted to leave? seriously), she mostly came out of the talk as supportive of the transfer. She told me that she's doing everything she can to find a good person to replace me, and as soon as she finds someone she'll release me. I feel good about this awkward conversation, because she knows where I stand and there isn't bad blood. As bizarre as she can be, I still mostly like her and firmly believe she's really just doing her best as a first year principal. I'm pretty sure the transfer will go through. It's just a matter of me being patient with the way time inevitably slows itself when working with this district.

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